


Streetlight Knock-out Never Happened

by nanisorero (miriam_lee)



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-20 15:03:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11923407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miriam_lee/pseuds/nanisorero
Summary: AU/missing scene, where after helping everyone escape from Shido’s palace, Ryuji feels that instead of being left unconscious under a streetlight, he deserves some basic respect.





	Streetlight Knock-out Never Happened

**Author's Note:**

  * For [@honenenen](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=%40honenenen).



> Happy b-day, hon!  
> I'm sorry it's not SoYo, but I know you hated this moment in P5 (just as I did), so I tried to fix it for you. Ryuji deserved so much better, ngah.

“H-hold on... OK? C'mon, I-I… almost... k-kinda died...!”

Ryuji’s words change absolutely nothing about the expressions of Futaba, Makoto and Haru. Ann’s tears are now gone, as if they were never there, and now it’s only anger blazing in her eyes.

“Uh, you guys are joking... right?”

Futaba raises an eyebrow. “Do we _look_ like joking to you?”

“Erm... no, you all look… sorta scary, I’d say…”

Ann makes a sweeping motion of the arm, preparing for what seems to be another slap on Skull’s face.

“Hey, hey, wait a _damn minute_!” He manages to step aside just in time. “I got it, you were worried, but it’s not like I wasn’t worried myself, y’know? I didn’t even know I’d make it out alive! How ‘bout expressin’ your feelings in a more…”

“ _Feminine_ way?” Makoto folds her arms, showing a clear disaffection with any possible gender stereotypes: something she probably picked up from her older sister.

Ryuji sighs and shakes his head.

“I didn’t say that, I just mean.. can I have a nice old ‘thanks’ once in a while? Not like it’s gonna hurt any of you. I can keep thankin’ that dude till I lose my voice.” With a bright smile, he looks at Akira, who’s standing at a safe distance and is obviously not planning to interfere any time soon. Ryuji frowns a little at the total absence of Joker’s support and then glances at Yusuke, but Fox pretends he’s too busy inspecting a rather plain pattern of the iron fence in front of the Diet Building.

Skull doesn’t even try to look at Morgana, because he _knows_ the cat is snickering in delight.

“Well, thanks for not getting yourself killed then, idiot!” Ann folds her arms now almost mirroring Makoto.

That’s when it strikes him.

“…Huh. So that’s how’t is?” Ryuji lets out a bitter chuckle.

“What’s that chuckling supposed to mean?” Ann furrows her brow.

As if to spite her, Ryuji gives out another flat laugh.

“You don’t really care. All of you.”

Both Akira and Yusuke are finally willing to get involved and excuse themselves, but Skull just gives them a fierce stare and no time to retort.

“No matter what I friggin’ do, you just take me for a joke,” Ryuji adds in a cold voice, much different from the one he usually argues in. “ ’Cause I’m nothing but a dumb and useless clown you’d never really count on. And you just can’t-.. no _don’t wanna_ see me in any other light.”

“That’s not-…”

“Not true?” Ryuji finishes the beginning of Haru’s phrase. “Okay then, let’s just picture him in my place for a sec,” he points toward Akira with his chin and then addresses his question to Ann. “Would you thank _him_ with a slap, huh?”

Panther frowns even further.

“This has nothing to do with-…”

“Would you?” Skull raises his voice and Ann does so in return.

“Of course I wouldn’t! But that’s.. that’s different,” she seems somewhat confused as she ends her thought.

Ryuji scoffs.

“Yea, ‘cause he – or anyone else here – is not a Stupid Dumbass Sakamoto. Not a comic relief you can all take it out on.”

“Stop,” Ann tries to cut Ryuji off, seeming especially distraught by his words now, but Skull’s too fired up to even hear her.

“Not someone you can put an ‘idiot’ label on for your damn convenience. All that shit’s reserved for me!”

“Just stop it.”

“It’s me who you can treat like some effin’ furniture and make it look like I totally deserve it. ‘Cause guess what? Yea, I’m just an moron who’ll tolerate it all, right?!”

“Enough already!” Ann doesn’t even acknowledge what she is doing when she gives Ryuji another slap on the face. The next moment, everyone including her know that it was the worst possible reflex in this situation.

“..Thanks for proving my point,” Ryuji mumbles as he slowly covers his burning cheek with his palm.

Priming her lips and looking another way, Ann doesn’t respond.

“But that last one’s my line,” he adds. “I’ve had enough.”

Everyone stares at him without uttering a word for almost half a minute.

“What do you mean?” Akira asks and the same question is on everyone else’s faces as well.

For a while, Skull just looks back at Joker and says nothing. Then he closes his eyes and slowly turns around.

“What I’ve just said,” his voice is collected and ‘normal’, but that’s far from _Ryuji’s_ normal. “Shido’s been Phantom Thieves’ last case anyway. Our job’s done. I’m out.”

Ryuji puts both hands in his pockets and starts moving in the direction opposite to where the rest of the team is.

After a few steps he stops and lets out one more half-hearted chuckle.

”I tried to make this a place where I could belong, y’know? I really tried. But in the end.. it’s just my track team all over again.” He sets off back. “I figure, I’d be better off on my own after all.”

Being the one who knows about Ryuji’s past best, Akira feels a pang of conscience and makes a step forward, determined to stop Skull from leaving. But Yusuke immediately grabs him by the shoulder.

“..I don’t think this the right moment,” Fox says in a low voice.

Joker wants to disagree, but then he sees guilt in Yusuke’s eyes too, and understands. What he wanted to do was to let go of this heavy feeling in his chest by explaining himself alone; what _they all_ need now – is to find the right words to apologize as a team. And Ryuji needs this too.

Clenching his fists and looking as his friend’s back disappears in the dusk, Akira gives a light nod.

“I guess we went too far,” Makoto mutters.

Futaba stares at the pavement.

“..U-huh.”

“So.. what should we do now?” Haru asks, looking as confused as everyone else.

“In a few hours he’ll probably just call Joker to say that he’s sorry anyway,” Morgana scoffs and Ann joins in.

“Yea, I mean that’s Ryuji we’re talking about, right? He snaps all the time. He’s not actually serious about quitting and all, it’s all just.. some sort of a joke?”

With her eyes closed, Queen shakes her head, as if understanding just how bad the situation has been for a while now.

“I believe this is the exact reason he actually _was_ serious,” Yusuke voices what Makoto has probably thought to herself. Ann bites her lip and falls silent.

“I’m going to apologize,” Akira says firmly. “Even if he’s the one to call first.”

“I think we _all_ should”, Haru agrees.

“Yes, but first we have to think it through. Last time we tried to apologize without a plan we ended up causing even more misunderstandings,” Makoto recalls.

“That’s because Ryuji kept spitting the worst things he could say about me,” Mona sniffs again.

“All the more reason to think it through this time.” Queen looks at Akira, and once he nods, it’s settled.

“Shall we discuss this over a meal then?” Yusuke suggests. “I’m feeling a bit hungry.”

Futaba gives him a side eye.

“You _always_ feel hungry, Inari.”

“Perhaps, I too should announce quitting to hear you apologize for your attitude,” Yusuke retorts.

“Hmph! Like I’d do that.”

“Guys, please, we have enough problems on our hands,” Makoto sighs, but as soon as she says that, Haru comes to her rescue.

“I know a nice café nearby it should be uncrowded. How about we eat and talk there?”

***

“..Are you sure it’s not your leg acting up?”

“Nah, mom, the leg’s fine. You heard what the doc said then, it needs time to heal, that’s all. I just..” Ryuji ruffles his hair. “..Feel kinda dizzy today. Maybe it’s the weather, I dunno.”

A woman in a light peach-colored coat looks at her son, who has just come up with the lamest excuse for ditching school she’d ever heard from him. But there’s also something about Ryuji’s eyes and voice that makes it clear for her: he does feel unwell. And with all the mess happening in his school over the past 6 months it almost seems natural.

“I hoped you’d buy something at school so I didn’t make dinner,” the woman says apologetically, “And I won’t be back until 5-…”

“It’s not like _I’m_ 5\. Don’t worry, I’ll whip somethin’ up.”

Ryuji’s mother lets that thought sink in and then reaches to the bag on her shoulder.

“Here,” she holds out some extra pocket money in her hand. “Order something when you get hungry. If you _really_ have a headache, then you should rest. No experiments in the kitchen, okay?”

A sheepish grin on her son’s face finally makes her feel somewhat relieved.

“Thanks, mom.”

She steps in her low-heeled shoes and pulls the door open.

“Lock up. And _rest_ , got it?”

“Fine, fine. Don’t stay overtime.”

The moment Ryuji closes the door from the inside, he exhales heavily, puts his 1,500 yen in a back pocket of his knee-breeches and goes to the living room. There’s a pile of documents on the coffee table in front of the sofa and for a while Skull wonders if his mother actually needed the papers at work today or left them at home on purpose. He then crashes on the couch, turns on a TV and starts flipping through the channels.

Just as he expected, no news about Shido is out there yet.

In some half an hour, Ryuji takes out a mobile phone to place an order for ramen in an app. Or so he tells himself, because once he unlocks the phone he just stares at the empty notification bar at the top of the screen. He promised himself he’d quit the chat as soon as any new thread appears, but the IM app has been silent since yesterday evening. And he couldn’t bring himself to unsubscribe from the group chat just yet.

A sudden doorbell proves Skull that his mother _does_ need the documents at work after all. He jumps up and grabs the papers.

“If you called, I coulda brought them to the station or to your office,” he says out loud as rushes into the hallway. “My headache isn’t that-…”

Ryuji opens the door and it’s not his mother at the doorstep but Akira with the hood on and no bag on his shoulder.

“…bad.” Skull finishes under his breath.

There’re a few moments of silence before Joker reaches for his phone and holds it up.

“Ann texted that you weren’t at school. And gave your address.”

“Did you already create a side chat that I’m not subscribed for, huh?” Ryuji finds himself saying.

“We would never do that,” Akira replies in a calm voice. “She sent me a PM.”

“Yea, whatever.”

More silence.

“Can I come in?”

Ryuji lets out a deep sigh and moves back, letting Joker step inside. Akira closes the door, takes the hood off and follows Skull to the living room.

Without a word, they both sit down on a couch in front of a TV and unwittingly check out the crawler messages.

“Lemme just ask you one thing,” Ryuji says when news pieces in the crawler change to a weather update. He doesn’t turn away from the screen though. “Are you here as Akira-the-friend or Akira-the-team-leader?”

“Both, I guess,” Joker replies after a short pause. “Because the team leader is your friend, too.”

They are quiet for a while, before Akira takes a deep breath – and exhales.

“I should’ve stepped in then.”

“That woulda change nothing,” Ryuji shrugs it off, his eyes still glued to the screen but not keeping track of anything happening on it. “It’s the whole attitude thing, not just that slap or anything.”

“I know. But you expected me to back you up and I didn’t.”

Skull doesn’t disagree with that.

“It’s because I didn’t think it gets to you”, Joker explains. “After you left, we talked it over with the others and _no one_ ever thought about it. So it’s our fault we made it look like we don’t care.”

Feeling rather uncomfortable, Ryuji scratches the back of his head.

“Man, seriously, I didn’t say all that stuff yesterday to make you apologize. I mean..” he hesitates for a while, “that’s just how it is, right? I’m not a born leader or some cool artist or a hacking prodigy or whatever.” He lowers his gaze to his right leg. “I’m just a friggin’ failure. And even if I’m trying to prove my worth, y’all see what I really am. A piece of trash.”

Skull doesn’t lift his head even when he sees and feels a pat of Akira’s hand on his right knee.

“We all feel like pieces of trash in one sense or another. Because each of us failed in some way before.”

“But y’all moved on, ‘cause you’ve got talents valuable for the team. I’m the only stupid running idiot, who-…”

“Who saved all our ‘valuable’ asses yesterday.”

“Yea, and got called out for it.”

They know they’re back to square one and go silent for almost a minute.

“We were really scared, you know? When we got out of Shido’s palace and you weren’t around. Girls were literally terrified.”

Ryuji shrugs again, as if saying that this wasn’t the reaction _he_ witnessed.

“And you looked damn cool back then, when you started that crazy sprint upwards, to the boat. Ryuji Sakamoto vs. Physics, 1/0.”

Skull lets out a slight chuckle.

“That was my only chance to ever look _c_ ool in front of all of you.”

“You were the _only one of us_ who could take that chance and succeed,” Akira corrects him.

“..Prolly,” Ryuji finally gives in a little and Joker uses the opportunity.

“Morgana thinks your legs did a job, worthy of his car mode. Futaba says she was just too embarrassed to thank you properly. And as Yusuke put it, you’re the soy sauce to any meal, so if you quit, the team won’t feel right to him.”

“..Wait, Yusuke says I’m _what_?” Ryuji perks up with his brows knitted, but Akira lets the comment slip and continues.

“Even though she’s a third-year, Haru sees you as her senior in the team, and Makoto apologizes for not noticing how you feel earlier. Just as I do.”

Skull doesn’t respond for a while and then exhales. “And Takamaki?”

Joker holds out a mobile phone with an IM window on the screen.

“..I’d better not relay that.”

Ryuji takes the phone in his hand and looks at a message with Ann’s icon on the left.

“Here’s the deal. He stops goggling at me in my PT-attire like that jerk Kamoshida, and he’ll feel the attitude difference right away. If he treats me with respect, I’ll gladly return the favor.”

“..Fair enough,” Ryuji gives the phone back to Akira.

“We’re all sorry,” Joker concludes. “For yesterday and for making you feel this way earlier.”

With a deep sigh, Skull leans to the sofa’s back.

“I’m sorry for that scene yesterday too, man. Didn’t want to look like some attention-craving kid.”

“You taught us a good lesson. Actually, we all agreed to pay closer attention to each other’s feelings from now on. Otherwise, this will only keep happening.”

Ryuji ruffles his hair, as if struggling with the words in his head.

“And um.. sorry for that track team comparison thing. I won’t deny I wanted it to get to _you_ , ‘cause only you know all the details, but-…”

Akira doesn’t let him finish. “I should’ve known how you feel even without any triggers. Especially since you let _me_ on the details.”

Skull seems almost flustered when he finally faces Joker and smiles a little.

“So um.. can I stay on the team?”

“You’re the ‘sauce’, remember?” Akira chuckles. “Shido _was_ our last case. But there’s more to the Phantom Thieves than just Palaces and Shadows, right?”

“Right,” Ryuji grins and then pats his friend on the shoulder. “Hey, we never had a chance to hang out at my place before, huh?”

“Yea.” It’s now that Joker examines the space around him: compared to both his attic and Futaba’s ‘cave’ – the only two rooms he’s been to for the past year – it actually looks like a _living_ room. He scratches his head the way he often does. “It’s.. nice.”

Skull’s grin widens.

“You haven’t seen my own room yet. So how ’bout we order some ramen, take it upstairs and look at all the manga and video games I’ve got?”

Akira doesn’t have any particular plans for the day. And even if he did have them, he’d feel too tempted to reschedule.


End file.
